Just Jo!

I was woken up very politely with a cup of tea this morning, so I thought I’d be one of them nice mums you hear about occasionally. I read some of Our Island Story, the demise of Charles 1 and then his son.

It reminded Olivia that we have a video of Henry V lurking in a cupboard and she was desperate to watch it. Then realising it was written by the William Man, she wanted to do all things Tudor-ish and Shakespearean. First up was grabbing every single book that was in any way, shape or form connected.

I got to spend a quiet hour making a mini Globe Theatre. Well, it would have been quiet if Olivia hadn’t kept pestering me….

"Go away! Leave me alone! Let me do it myself!"

"Mum! Can I please do it?!"

It’s a teeny tiny model that sits in the palm of my hand. She got to make the big Elizabethan Theatre that I’d bought last year, down in Totnes I think. She did it all herself and was so excited because it came with a much-shortened script of A Midsummer Night’s Dream, with full stage directions and everything. (Should have let her do the Globe….I wanted to do the biggie!) When it was finished, she really felt the lack of suitably aged siblings to enact the play. Adam had gone out by this time (couldn’t really see him participating anyway!) and it’s really hard to control a cast of 24 with only 2 hands. She gave it her best shot though, with Maisy for an audience.

There is photographic evidence, but I’ve got to wait for Flickr….

The rest of the day was spent in the highly educational pursuit of finding lots more paper models to make. She got round to making a few from a site that she’s had her eye on for a while now. A very girly one, with lots of fairies, cute animals and the odd unicorn thrown in. And she made me a frog while I was in the bath. Result!! I like frogs I do!

After dinner, we went upstairs to finally start watching Henry V. She is Shakespeare mad, so I think a trip to the real Globe is essential at some point this year. We got halfway through but then it was time for bed. Technically, I suppose she was already abed and p.j’d. But we’re out tomorrow so she needs to sleep. Please!

And I wanted to watch Dawn of the Dead anyway because I hadn’t seen the new version. ‘Twas alright…. if you don’t need any kind of intelligence for a couple of hours. I still prefer Shaun of the Dead though. Very funny and very English. Well, what other nation would immediately sit down for a cup of tea after killing two zombies (Don’t use the Z word!) in the back garden?!

Now I’ve just read through this, it sounds like I’m being very sensible and somewhat grown-up….Can’t be having that now can we?!

So to redress the balance….here’s a joke courtesy of Prydwen. This’ll be the adult humour bit….for those who actually read the categories listings!

At a Senior Citizen’s luncheon, an elderly gentleman and an elderly lady struck up a conversation and discovered that they both loved to fish.

Since both of them were widowed, they decided to go fishing together the next day. The gentleman picked the lady up, and they headed to the river to his fishing boat and started out on their adventure.

They were riding down the river when there was a fork in the river, and the gentleman asked the lady,

"Do you want to go up or down?"

All of a sudden the lady stripped off her shirt and pants and made mad passionate love to the man right there in the boat !

When they finished, the man couldn’t believe what had just happened, but he had just experienced the best sex that he’d had in years.

They fished for a while and continued on down the river, when soon they came upon another fork in the river.

He again asked the lady, "Up or down ?"

There she went again, stripped off her clothes, and made wild passionate love to him again.

This really impressed the elderly gentleman, so he asked her to go fishing again the next day.

She said yes and there they were the next day, riding in the boat when they came upon the fork in river, and the elderly gentleman asked, "Up or down?"

The woman replied, "Down."

A little puzzled and disappointed, the gentleman guided the boat down the river when he came upon another fork in the river and he asked the lady,"Up or down ?"

She replied, "Up."

This really confused the gentleman so he asked, "What’s the deal? Yesterday, every time I asked you if you wanted to go up or down you made mad passionate love to me. Now today, nothing!"

She replied, "Well, yesterday I wasn’t wearing my hearing aid and I thought the choices were "f*** or drown."

Now I’m going to bed and hoping that I get up in time to catch the bus tomorrow!