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A frog goes into a bank and approaches the teller. He can see from her nameplate that her name is Patricia Whack.

“Miss Whack, I’d like to get a £30,000 loan to take a holiday.”

Patty looks at the frog in disbelief and asks his name. The frog says his name is Kermit Jagger, his dad is Mick Jagger, and that it’s okay, he knows the bank manager.

Patty explains that he will need to secure the loan with some collateral.

The frog says, “Sure. I have this,” and produces a tiny porcelain elephant, about an inch tall, bright pink and perfectly formed.

Very confused, Patty explains that she’ll have to consult with the bank manager and disappears into a back office.

She finds the manager and says, “There’s a frog called Kermit Jagger out there who claims to know you and wants to borrow £30,000, and he wants to use this as collateral.”

She holds up the tiny pink elephant. “I mean, what in the world is this?”

…

…

…

….

The bank manager looks back at her and says…

Wait for it…

…

…

“It’s a knickknack, Patty Whack. Give the frog a loan. His old man’s a Rolling Stone.”

(You’re singing it, aren’t you? Yeah, I know you are……..)

OK, so I’ll keep sharing the jokes!!

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Love this one, although I got woefully left behind.

And just after this is when we missed the bus. Not so much ‘missed’ as much as Stagecoach suddenly deciding that they were going to stop running the bus. A bus we’ve caught countless times coming home from Chagford after seeing Olivia’s grandparents.
The girls kept me entertained though….

After witnessing a quite spectacular sunset, not that the girls were overly impressed….

….we wandered up to Drewsteignton to partake of liquid refreshments and await our lift home.
A bit of a late night, followed by what was supposed to be an early start the next day. But we overslept and it was far too hot and humid to be rushing about, so plans got changed. Fortunately we’ve got very accommodating friends who are very lovely!
Instead of going to Newton Abbot to visit a World Music Festival (which by all accounts wasn’t as good as hoped), we got the train straight to Totnes, then got a steam train. Which pleased Olivia no end, because she’s suddenly Harry Potter mad and kept saying it was just like the Hogwart’s Express. Repeatedly.

We met up with our friends down by the river….

Then it was back to their’s, a lovely meal, chatting and staying the night, followed by a day up on Dartmoor….

We could quite easily have spent much, much longer there (including more shared food at our friends house!), but we really had to get back for Olivia to get an early night. She was very tired. She’s not good when she’s tired. In a whiney, moany, tearful not good way when she’s tired. She proved my point when I said we really had to get home, she wailed. So did B. Yes, I managed to make two girls cry that day!
But she needed her sleep!
For this!
Windsurfing!
Another one of the activities that yours truly has organised.

A very successful day, very much enjoyed!
After she’d finished, we did a bit of shopping. A new tent. One of life’s essentials.
It is! Honest!
We discovered on our last camping trip, that our tent wasn’t quite big enough. We had to put our bag in a friends tent. See? We needed a bigger tent!
And on Tuesday, I needed a new phone. I did! Honest!
Especially one with a camera!
Which I had to test out while we were seeing our friend Di and checking up on her allotment….

I like my new phone almost as much as my new camera!
A Sony Ericsson, but go to Phones 4 U, so much cheaper than Amazon!

Big news last night was that Adam found out he did very well in his trip up to London last week.

Can you read it? He’s practically got the job! So he’s a happy little camper. Except you’d never catch him in a tent. Ever!
But we (as in the girlies of this household) tested out our new tent this morning….pleased to say, it works! Which is jolly good as we’re going camping again very soon.

What other news?
Ooh yeah! We saw one of Olivia’s school friends while at the river on Monday. Except he’s not a ’school’ friend any longer! They’ve taken the plunge and he’s now being home educated! Yay! Perhaps all my ’selling’ has paid off! So we’re looking forward to seeing lots more of them.
And the kitchen? Yep, lady from the council came. I’m having pale cream flooring, beech units, very dark blue marble worktops, white tiles and I’ve got a funny feeling I’ll be providing the white paint for the walls, ‘cos they don’t do white. It will be taking three weeks (give or take a few days), but they’re taking everything right back to bare floor and bricks. New wiring, new plumbing, everything.
No idea when of course….
But like I said, do I care?
Absolutely not! Oh life is indeed good!!
And today (or yesterday, now that I’ve seen what the time is), seeing as my new phone is on the Orange network, it’s (it was) Orange Wednesday. So we went to Vue to see The Simpson’s Movie. Buy one, get one free. So I was assuming I’d pay for an adult and Olivia would be free as she’s a child and therefore cheaper than me. But no! I am apparently cheap! Shut up! I got in free! I’ll make Olivia pay next time then!
And Olivia started back at drama. And very happy she was to see all her friends again. Athough, as some of them pointed out, they have seen her over the summer holiday….
Oh yeah, and I’ve booked our tickets for the Tutankhamun exhibition in London. The second week of December. Maybe Adam will put us up overnight. Or not….

I’m also allowed to finally post a photo of Olivia’s stone age scene ‘cos it’s now finished….

We made a flying visit to group on Wednesday. There was another workshop at the museum the same day. Animals in Native American art, so we got to make totems. But first we had to say hello to this beast….

We had one of Olivia’s drama friends with us, who took part in the totem making but refused point blank to go anywhere near the snake.
She came back to our house after and set Olivia up with her own Bebo account. Because Olivia really doesn’t spend enough time on the ‘puter.

I’ve had a birthday, so I’m now older than I was. Whoop de doo. It was going to be postponed ’til next week because we’re all skint. But both the kids took it in turns to make me cups of tea in the morning. Then Olivia disappeared off on a Guides day out, leaving me with the pleasurable company of Adam for most of the day, ’til he disappeared off to work. I had a bath. A long one. With lots of bubbles.
Then Lisa treated me to a lovely night out. Tapas meal, then a club with lots of alcohol.
And a very nice barman, who made the mistake of almost falling onto our table. He was very lucky to escape our clutches!
‘Twas a very lovely night indeed, thanks Lisa!
And my birthday’s not over yet, as Adam is treating us to a meal out somewhere after he gets paid, which is on Friday. But he won’t be here that day. He’ll be up in London being interviewed by Richard Branson. Sort of.
Anyway, I digress, got home at 1:30, then woke up completely and couldn’t get to sleep ’til gone three. Which was not good, as we had to be up early the next day in order to catch a train. We were heading back down to Totnes to be picked up for a drive to Spitchwick, on the edge of Dartmoor. A birthday picnic, not mine, a little friend who is now the grand old age of three. Although I did get Happy Birthday sung ‘at’ me.

We saw ponies too! Well, it is Dartmoor….

One of those truly lovely and relaxed days with friends, plenty of food, plenty of chatting, plenty of giggling….
More pics here.

Boring food shop and bill paying day on Monday so we’ll gloss over that.
But we had another lovely day out yesterday.
Lisa picked Olivia up and I got the bus. Which meant that I obviously got there hours after Lisa and her sister.
Where?
The Amazing Maize Maze at Bickleigh. A gloriously hot sunny day. Picnic first, ride round on go-karts, then the maze. The girls had to find brass rubbings hidden in the maze. The brass rubbings all joined up to spell out “Sir Robert Baden Powell Chief Scout of the world Be Prepared”.

My personal fave from the day….

It turned into a very hot day, not helped by the fact that the last rubbing was incredibly elusive. I’m sure someone kept moving it. But, after purchasing ice lollies, we headed back into the maze determined not to let it beat us! Yay! We found it! Then there was the obligatory paddling to be done.

Lisa took all the girls home. And I missed the bus by seconds.
The driver shrugged apologetically as he pulled away….
Not too concerned though, there is a jolly nice pub across the road.
I took some pics in the garden while supping me shandy….

More pics from the day here.
Yes, another one of them lovely days.

This morning we’ve had a visit from the council man to do the annual gas check. The fire is never used, except as a display area for Olivia’s arty crafty bits and pieces, so we had to clear it off for him. I happened to mention that we never use it and he asked if I wanted it taken away. Ooh! Yes please! So we have a little bit more room in the sitting room now, which will be occupied by a bookcase (currently residing in Olivia’s room) as soon as another council man has bricked up the hole and replastered.
But…. but…. but…. the bestest news is that Adam wasn’t winding me up about the kitchen!!
There is a lady coming this very afternoon to go over colour options with me . Yay!!! Blokey this morning said they take about three weeks to fit it, which means no kitchen for the duration. Do I care? Not a blinkin’ sausage!
And I had a lovely card from my mum and stepdad with a big fat cheque in it.
Adam’s gone to pay it in for me, ‘cos I’m not stepping outside the house, just in case I miss the council ladyand my new kitchen is delayed.

Her play was outstandingly good, pics here. Even Adam thought it was great.
We’ve had a lovely day in the garden today, time and the weather finally letting us get it tidied and sorted.

Yes, it’s been a somewhat roller coaster week….all the hoohah at the beginning, followed by some gorgeously giggly and chatty days, followed by the intense excitement, nerves and pride (both of us) of Olivia’s first play….followed by some unbelievably sad news this afternoon.
My usual witterings and burblings seem very much flippant, so I won’t bother.

Nice sunset last night by the way….
Olivia saw it and wanted to get a photo of it. I told her no. Because she’s doing the photo prompts every morning and I haven’t taken a photo in days.

Yes, I know they look identical. But they’re not. Perhaps I should do some kind of Spot The Difference Competition? How many differences can you spot?

Updated to add….
I ended up doing a bit of both. I read in the garden ’til it got too hot ( ) then cooled off upstairs watching a film. Memento. One of those that I’m going to have to watch again because my sun addled brain kept drifting away.